ego's suicide?

The learned spiritual teacher who gave a talk to an elite audience yesterday said that most of the problems and agonies of individuals arise only from their ego. The ‘I’ and ‘mine’, have to be got rid off. Eliminating the ‘I’ is the purpose of spiritualism so as to prepare oneself to approach divinity.
I have been hearing this too often. The ego, the culprit, has to be killed! It seems to be there in all the spiritual texts. It looked to me as a sort of extortion to commit suicide! The saying itself is traditional, and by repetition it has almost become a cliché that nobody pays much attention to, as if it is a saying taken for granted in any spiritual talk or discussion.
But for the understanding of the present day minds, there is a slightly different approach to the same idea or fact, which appeals to me. The EGO can never be eliminated. It can only be quieted. Elimination of the ego is suicide. Only when the person dies the ego gets eliminated from the body. Here what is meant by the EGO is the constant feeling of ‘I’ and not the boosting of the ‘I’ with self importance.
‘I’ is necessary in day to day life. Like the mind, and being a creature of the mind, ‘I’ is a useful tool that can be used positively and constructively. Here the user is also ‘I’, activated and identified by the underlying reality.
‘I’ is quiet in real meditation, may be even for a few moments only. But on coming out of meditation, ‘I’ becomes as active and as virulent as ever, unless the ‘I’ is understood while in meditation or otherwise. Every aspect of ‘I’ has to be directly perceived and understood before it can become quiet. When the ego is quiet one can go ‘beyond’ it. Or at least try to feel what is behind it illumining it. Direct perception of the ego in meditation eliminates its virulent negativity and allows itself to be quiet even on coming out of the state of meditation. Attention to all passing thoughts, images, visions, emotions, regression incidents etc. help to perceive and understand the ego allowing itself to be totally quiet until evoked for use.
As an example let us take the ego’s fear of death. Fear of death is part of the ego, the ‘I’. In meditation you either feel or perceive as an outsider, the nature of the fear of death with all the accompanying symbols, images, noises and visions. You notice the underlying fear and understand that there is actually only ‘fear’ underneath and not ‘fear of death’ in particular’ It is the one fear as a single emotion that is projected as fear of death, fear of disease, fear of losing one’s job, etc., etc. On understanding this, the fear, losing its identification with death, becomes quiet. That part of the ego is then quiet even after coming out of meditation, because the knowledge of the nature of fear remains with the ego. Simple fear as a dormant emotion may still be there because of one’s physical chemistry, but its intensity slowly fades.

Symbols of terror and fear

Symbols of terror and fear: Behind the ancestral joint family house we were living way back in the twenties of the last century, there was a hill known by the same name as that of my family. It was a hill with naturally terraced slopes thickly vegetated and with wild growth of tall trees like teak wood, jack fruit, mango, and a large number of other jungle wood. There were even a few sandal wood trees. While climbing up one could see hares, rabbits, and wild fowl running about. At night we could hear the howling of jackals, wild cats and the hooting of large owls, known to be an omen signifying death somewhere in the area.
Once we reached the top of the hill we could run on flat plain ground carpeted with green grass stretching from one end on the right to the other end on the left, where there was the famous Siva temple. Portions of the flat plain nearer the temple was rugged with black boulders. During the Onam season we, the group of boys and girls in the house, of eight to twelve years age, used to climb up the terraces to reach the top where there were plenty of bushes on the sides full of flowers of all hues to pluck and gather.
I would run up the first few terraces with all energy and enthusiasm, but would have to immediately slow down breathless while others would happily proceed to move up much ahead. I would feel tired with a sort of heaviness crushing my chest. Stopping for a minute or two, I would attempt to catch up with the others. But a sort of fear and loneliness haunted me then making me afraid of being left alone Yet, I would push myself up, not wanting to be considered unfit to go up.
On the third or fourth day of the first truck up on my being allowed in the team, as I parried for breath, I noticed some newly half burnt and charred logs of wood kept by the side at the edge of one of the terraces. Suddenly, a funny feeling engulfed me making me sad and afraid. Something was eerie there! Other boys told me in whispers that the logs are left-over of the cremation of some dead body. Somebody had died a couple of days earlier. Terror struck me in the pit of my stomach as if it was waiting for a reason to strike. I somehow pretended as if nothing had happened, but while returning made it a point to walk as far away from the logs as possible covering myself from it behind other boys. The fear remained and haunted me at night, the dark, charred logs appearing before my closed eyes.
Thereafter, I felt terror and torment whenever I crossed the charred logs, any charred logs, and sometimes even those which had no connection with any cremation or death. It was as if the terror was always there within oneself waiting for an opportunity to haunt. Charred logs, a symbol of death served as a trigger.
As time passes one wards off from the mind all fearful and uneasy thoughts and symbols to get along with day to day life. Emotional upheavals of everyday life and absorption in work help one to keep aside what is unpleasant and fearful. But they are never forgotten altogether. They come up and surface later on whenever the mood is depressing.
The opportunity for going into the phenomenon came when I suffered a heart problem at the ripe old age of seventy-five years. I had to get an angiograph done. Now I have a CD showing the beating of my heart and the blood vessels supplying blood to my heart. From the time of my birth I have been having an insufficient blood vessel supplying blood to my heart, and I have been living all along only because of a not-so-efficient connecting vessel from one side of the heart to the other known as a ‘collateral’. A sinking feeling, with fear and terror, is part of the problem whenever any exertion is done with an insufficient heart.
Connecting everything together, I came to the following conclusion. The insufficiency of my heart started manifesting itself as soon as I climbed a few terraces of the hill of my childhood. I started becoming breathless, started having the sinking feeling and the fear of death. At that exact moment I noticed the charred logs that had a connection with death, and got mentally fixed to it. A coincidence or not, the insufficiency of the heart, the breathlessness, the fear and terror, the charred logs, cremation, dead body and the natural fear of death, all combined together to create an obsessive fear of charred logs! Does Destiny or Almighty pre-plan such a thing to teach a person an elevating lesson? I wonder.

blank mind?

When the mind is deliberately kept silent, it is blank with no thought allowed to be present. But it is not naturally silent, not spontaneously quiet. Lurking behind, waiting to erupt out are fears and thoughts not allowed to come up and surface.
What are they? Fears to be tackled, tasks to be completed, disputes and controversies to be settled, problems to be solved, and emotions that are suppressed. When all these are lurking below the surface of the blank mind how can deeper and deeper disturbances lying dormant in the subconscious come up breaking the barrier of the superficial thoughts and fears near the surface?
Therefore what is in the surface has to be first allowed to come up and exhaust itself by directly seeing them and understanding them, if thoughts and emotions lying dormant deep within are to be noticed and tackled. Therefore it is not advisable to try to create a silent mind in order to avoid facing minor disturbances. What is needed is only not to go along with the disturbances identifying with any part of it. Let them come up. Just observe them for what they are, superficial unrealities.
Often when the mind is naturally silent also, it is a blank. Is there then nothing underneath striving to come up? Is it really blank? Yes, and No. Yes, in the sense that no thought or image recognizable at the moment comes up. But No, it is not blank, when you consider the screen before the closed eyes.
There is a screen in front of the closed eyes. The screen then slowly develops pixel dots of different colors. Clouds of different colors move one over the other forming clusters and shapes of no significance. But they are pleasantly bright. As you feel a little relaxed (drowsy), the shapes get meaning and significance. They become people, things, scenes, buildings and landscapes. Sounds appear from nowhere. What is deep down below may come up.
Or may be, one is dreaming or hallucinating! Yet they are from far down within.
But if the mind is in alert attention, although blank, it is a clean slate, a clear color screen with no images or shapes. Such a relaxed state is silent, peaceful and enjoyable. But what has it to do with the power that runs the show?

Human Rights

Prof. Richard Hay: When I start speaking about Human Rights, the first thing that comes to my mind is the pitiable state of health sector in India. It is a matter of shame that the majority of Indians do not have access to reliable health care services. Kerala may be an exemption to this sad state of affairs. Right to life is one of the basic human rights. I believe, access to reliable health care is therefore the right of every human being. Indian health care system is the most privatized system of the world. Govt. has been neglecting this vital sector which should normally ensure the proper upkeep of the health of every citizen in the country. Let me refer to the National Rural Health Mission Report. This crucial report, which has brought to light certain stark realities, reveals the lop-sided development of the health sector in India. It is a damning indictment of the health care system in our country which is a socialist, secular and democratic republic. It is evident that Govts. have failed miserably on this count. Public money is squandered and crucial sectors are neglected.
The report states that the majority of the Primary Health Centers are ill equipped and short staffed. 8% of the PHCs do not have even a single doctor. 17.7% of the PHCs do not have a pharmacist. 39% do not have lab technicians. Adding to the woes of the poor villagers in India there are no labor rooms and operation theatres in the majority of the PHCs. With such lapses on the part of the Govt.s, how can we expect the vast majority of our countrymen to be healthy and able bodied to contribute their mite for the growth of the GDP of the country? Due to lack of proper medical care, the productivity of Indian labor has become the lowest in the world. In such a deplorable and despicable situation what kind of human rights can be ensured to the common man of India?
It is evident from the media reports that the basic rights of the citizens are denied in our country mainly on the basis of religion, caste, gender and also economic depravity. Umpteen incidents have been reported in the media proving that atrocities inflicted upon the weak and oppressed in our country are mostly carried out by religious bigots, caste-ists, anti-women lobbies, and the like. In most cases, political parties are directly involved in these predominantly communal clashes. What is disturbing is that most of these are institutionalized oppressions, heavily financed by political parties. In all these cases women and children are the most vulnerable persons subjected to inhuman treatment by the powerful political parties and their outfits.
What is the remedy? In this regard, I wanted to collect information as to the stentorian role, if any, played by the parliament and state legislature in protecting human rights. I find that only on very few occasions have they deliberated on such burning issues. It seems that they were more vociferous and outspoken when they were taken to task by their political rivals or by some others on matters of violation of their own rights. Then it is found that they raise much hue and cry in these highest democratic institutions. The reason being, political parties are not much bothered about the violations of human rights of the common man. It is a known fact that a corrupt political system can never protect the human rights of their citizens. The major cause for never ending human rights violation is the existence of astronomical corruption in India. Political parties breed corruption. After sixty years of independence, whom can we blame for the perpetration of poverty and all other social evils in our great country? Everybody knows that corruption is the major factor that gas kept India poor and thereby made the common man miserable. The common man is treated like leeches and untouchables. If one checks upon, as an example, the quantum of money spent by the Govt. for the amelioration of the scheduled castes and tribes, a veritable truth will emerge. To substantiate this, may I quote Rajeev Gandhi, the former Prime Minister of India, who made the public statement, “if a rupee is spent by the Govt., only 15 paisa reaches the genuine beneficiary. “ This public statement pin points the veracity of facts relating to the corrupt practices of politicians and bureaucrats.
Another human rights violation that is taking place in the corridors of power is the sizable perks that the people’s representatives enjoy while they turn a blind eye to the developing needs of the poor country.
Let me take you back to the pristine Gandhian era. The Mahatma categorically stated that the congress party must be disbanded, as they by that time had perhaps proved that they were misfits to govern the country. What the Mahatma had feared has become the reality. It is their party which ruled India for a long time, and still continuing in power, that is responsible for the perpetration of poverty in our country. Other parties only followed suit. Who is bothered about the human rights of the poor and marginalized in India? There is almost an abrogation of human rights when it comes to the poor. The have-nots in India can be called by a little sophisticated term – ‘Vote Banks’, for which purpose they are exploited by the powers be, to cling on to power. Look at the undeniable facts – more than 50% of India’s population live in constant economic insecurity in the midst of plenty! Please have a look at the caricature of India’s common man in all media publications. He is week, feeble, thin and skinny, hungry-looking, and even haunted by economic insecurity, fear, and resentment. This appalling condition has warped his personality. He is denied of all social and human rights. They have been suffering agonies of discrimination for ages. If the importance of economic planning is relegated, within a short span of time, we fear, due to lack of food security, our whole economic infrastructure will collapse which would result in great human tragedies in the form of starvation, famine, homelessness, widespread diseases and many other calamities. Human rights protagonists will have to then consider still more burning issues – that of the very survival of the common man in our country. Will they then rise to the occasion? God only knows!
May I also touch upon the role of judiciary? Do the courts in India have efficient machinery to attend to human rights violations? Have a look at the statistics regarding the back-log of pending cases in the Indian judicial system. In 2006, 36.5 cases were pending in higher courts, while lower courts had a whopping 2.48 crores cases. The oft repeated words of caution that ‘justice delayed is justice denied’ boomerangs across the corridors of Indian courts. It is the right of every Indian to see that justice is carried out without much delay. If the judiciary is not able to protect the rights of the citizenry on a time bound basis, who else can do it? Let me give you one more piece of information to prove how inefficient are we as a country. It takes 425 to 1165 days to enforce a contract in the Indian courts. Adding to our woes, it is reported in the media that even judges are corrupt, who are supposed to be the custodians of public justice and paragons of moral excellence and virtue. Recently I read an article in which a learned judge opined that even judges these days fall a prey to the consumerist craving. When the judiciary is also not able to attend to cases of human right violations on account of these reasons we are certainly deprived of any protection of human rights. Let me quote former Supreme Court Justice Santosh Hegde. “75% of human rights violations were due to corruption.” He said. He also stated that there are two types of citizens in our country. The first type becomes rich by dint of hard work done for 24 long years. The second type becomes rich within 24days by corrupt practices. In such a disastrous situation, how can the citizens expect justice in protecting human rights? The arrests of few swamis in Kerala shed more light on this matter of grave concern.
What kind of human rights do we enjoy in our own society? Take for instance our traffic system on our roads. Motorists have total disregard for traffic rules or basic courtesies. People spit in public places and behaves rudely to others. The police think that their first and foremost duty is to abuse and insult any citizen who he comes in contact. Public manners remain appalling. There is lack of democratic culture in India. Shoddy governance and poor infrastructure continue to retard the country’s prospects for faster economic development. Abrogation of human rights has become the order of the day.
Well, protection of human rights is the key for the development of a free, democratic and secular society. The Govts. and public authorities should be made more responsible to establish human rights in our country. The sooner, the better.